The most important thing for you to do now is some careful planning and doing the breakup right. For starters: Don’t ever breakup with someone over the phone, in a text message, or a “Dear John” letter, this is simply cowardly. If you don’t have the confidence to breakup in person, then maybe you should rethink the action that you are about to take. Conduct your breakup with your significant other in person, preferably in private, and don’t humiliate them by breaking up in public. You will end up having more respect for yourself, and although they will not like the fact you are breaking up with them, they will have more respect for you in the long run.
NOTE: Obviously, if your significant other has a tendency to become violent, this advice will not apply to your situation. Stay safe and handle the break up over the phone or in public.
Honesty is important, but if the reason for the breakup is that you have found someone new… this is information to keep yourself. Even if they ask, don’t tell them. There is no point in causing them more pain than they feel already. A breakup is always a form of rejection. To be rejected by your loved one for another person is a deep kind of hurt. Go ahead and start your new relationship, but do yourself a favor and to keep it on the down-low, even though you may not want to… at least for a while. You don’t want your ex to come at you or your new love in a jealous rage. Make new memories with your new love in new places, which are special only to the two of you.
Plan out what you want to say beforehand, because no matter how you feel, you will be nervous when breaking up with them. Be firm and stand your ground. You have made this decision for well thought out reasons, so stick to it. You will sound less convincing if you try to let them down easy. They will be just as hurt either way so state your reasons calmly and confidently.
When the breakup is done; don’t call them for any reason and don’t take their calls. This will only give them false hope and keep the hurt fresh in both your minds. Don’t kid yourself; you will feel a sense of loss after the breakup, too. Change the habits the two of you had. Don’t keep going to the same coffee house or restaurants you did when you were together. You might accidentally bump into them and then they might think you were there just to see them.
If you haven’t already met someone new, it’s probably best to hold off on dating for a while. You may have had more time to process the breakup than your ex, but you should still give yourself some time to adjust to your new single life. It sounds weird, but even if you’re the one who ended the relationship, you can be vulnerable to a rebound relationship too, so give it some time.
Most people don’t realize that regardless which side of the breakup you are on, it’s tough. Unless your ex is a real jerk, you’ll want to find a way to end the relationship as gently, yet firmly, as possible.
Sooner or later we all learn that the best things in life are not really things at all, but the relationships that we have with others in our lives… especially the relationship that we have with our significant other. There are times when that relationship is in trouble, or failing, or failed. At those specific times in our lives we need unbiased outside input and support to guide our way through the emotional minefields.
Boogiedog Love is just such a place. A place where you will find suddenly single articles that offer specific strategies on all phases of breaking up and making up. These are not theoretical ideas or strategies, but in-the-world tested strategies that have worked for others. Here you will find programs, articles, links, and a FREE periodical article opt-in service to meet your emotional needs. By choosing to do nothing, you are choosing to prolong your anguish and remain feeling like a victim. Choose to visit http://www.boogiedog-love.com and change your life.