What the love is going on? (Did you like that shameless plug?)
Well, here’s what you need to know. For the most part, you expect too much. You expect to go out looking your best and that someone will notice. Yea, that worked about a decade ago. Now, it’s a matter of being in the right place at the right time AND with the right people. So, just to make it clear, here are the THREE reasons why your are, in fact, dateless.
Reason One: Looking for love in all the wrong SPACES.
I’ve said it before, but I will repeat myself just for you. There are three types of spaces that I have identified. They are: Carnal, Communal, and Committal. These terms define both spaces and people. But, here’s the deal. Most of time, you are in carnal space, looking for communal or committal people. Carnal people are in carnal spaces. They are interested in the flesh–your flesh. The ultimate goal is to have sex with you, not converse with you or get to know you (as things happen in communal space) and not to get into a relationship with you (committal space). Now, unless you are walking around looking carnal (aka the TnA show), then you will be unsuccessful in carnal spaces. If you are approached in a carnal space, then know that the goal is simple–I just told you, and if that’s not what you are looking for, then bid them a fond farewell.
You get it?
Reason Two: The predator knows its prey; and you aren’t edible.
If you remotely look like you have things together in your life, then that is yet another reason why you are not being asked out. Now, I fervently believe that there are good men out there. However, for every good guy, there are about 20 that are poised and ready, on the prowl for their next “meal.” Unfortunately, it is easier for you to encounter these predators than it is for you to get to the good guy (but he is out there). So, you just have to be okay with the fact that you are in a waiting and holding pattern for the good guy. In the meanwhile, you can also roll your eyes at the unworthy idiot who is attempting to get your number.
Just so you know, this goes for guys too, but it would take to long to re-word it, so just use your imagination.
Reason Three: You need to bring sexy back.
Now I am putting this all on you. While, I don’t advise presenting your assets as they do in CARNAL-Ville, I do recommend showing off your best assets by way of clothes, makeup, a well-fitted suit…do you get the idea? For example, if you have great legs, then show them off, don’t hide them. You don’t need a skirt up to your cookie to show them off, but a well tailored pencil skirt will do the trick and still be professional. If you’ve been in the gym, then please, sir, make sure that those oxfords and suit jackets are cut just right. Now, you can leave the “smedium” baby T’s where they are, but just make sure that we can see that awesome form.
Coming out of your house looking like a potato sack, or a dull-dressed man, isn’t serving you any purpose. Even the great guy or girl has eyes in their head, and they will see you before they talk to you. So, an awesome personality is a plus, but don’t forsake a pair of jeans with a great fit, or a shirt that picks up the blue in your eyes.
Ok…I think I have made my point. Now, if you are doing all these things (or not doing) and not getting dates, at least now you have a reason. So, in the meanwhile, work on your hobbies, take up yoga, and read a good book–like mine.